I will think of you

I will think of you
when I see red geraniums
bloomin' in the spring
and nursery grown hardy mums
in a rainbow of colors
bloomin' in the fall

I will think of you
on Halloween night
and your stories
of the trick you played
pinning horns
old school fun
back in the day
yours

I will think of you
when Christmas comes
the aroma of pine needles
fillin' the air
premium quality fresh cut trees
one of your many specialties
at the nursery
you owned

I will think of you
when deviled eggs
are on the menu
especially at Easter

I will think of you
when U of I and ISU are playing
football and basketball
you rarely missed a game

I will think of you
and your paper piles
as I sit surrounded by mine
you respected my system
since it was so much
like your own

I will think of you
and your hazel eyes
that twinkled when you teased
I read you pretty well
and sometimes played along
'til you gave up tryin'
with a chuckle and a grin

I will think of you
and your suit coats
some more memorable
than others
business with class
panache
savvy and sharp
part shark
ever watchful
of the bottom line

I will think of you
in the fall, winter
and early spring
summertime too
Catalog Season
it grew to be year 'round
but not on my calendar
not anymore
I walked away
you let me go
business cool fell away
in a sea of salty tears
my heart was breaking
loyalty split in two
family first
mine

I will think of you
and remember
your heart
for family
friends
employees
and strangers

I will think of you
and remember
the millions of catalogs
printed at your say so
product
prices
paper
postage
printing
art and copy too
you oversaw it all

I will think of you
and remember
the good times
mentoring
negotiating
analyzing
dreaming
planning for next season
next spring
next fall
hoping it'll be better
or just as good
lookin' back
lookin' ahead
livin' in the now

I will think of you
and remember
the thrill of day trips
on your private jet
for business
in Minnesota
New York
and Virginia
that was my favorite
seeing the sun rise
from above the clouds
the great ships
mere specks
from the air
sandcastle views
at lunchtime
and then home
in time for supper

I will think of you
and remember
a week long trip
you sent my family on
a fairy tale come true
five short years ago

I will think of you
most of all
when I see green felt tip writing
scrawled on a yellow legal pad
then I will remember
you

The man I worked for, for over eleven years, died on Friday morning, November 4, 2011. A friend, who left the company before I did, let me know he was gone via a Friday evening e-mail. It was lung cancer, though he never smoked. His doctors didn't think he'd live 'til Christmas a year ago. He proved 'em wrong, fighting every step of the way, from what I hear. I thought of him often, in the years since I left his employ. It was for the best. My going. It was. Though still one of the hardest things I've ever done. Stupid cancer.

Two Years Ago Today
http://my.opera.com/jbaird/blog/2011/06/19/2-years-ago-today

Untangled
http://my.opera.com/jbaird/blog/untangled

© 2011 Janean Baird, Turquoise Tangles

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2 thoughts on “I will think of you

  1. Sarah writes:Janean, you are so incredible in so many wonderful ways. Knowing this journy makes this even more excellent. Mr. Owen and his family would be proud of your writing and work. He always was proud of your work and believed in you. He never stopped even when you turned in your keys. I hope one day to get handed a published book of your heart. There is a wall on the outside sometimes… but that is only to protect the tears from falling. Thank you for sharing your heart through your writing. I miss you and love you forever and ever. Love, your best sister in the world. HUGS.

  2. Originally posted by anonymous:

    Sarah writes:Janean, you are so incredible in so many wonderful ways. Knowing this journy makes this even more excellent. Mr. Owen and his family would be proud of your writing and work. He always was proud of your work and believed in you. He never stopped even when you turned in your keys. I hope one day to get handed a published book of your heart. There is a wall on the outside sometimes… but that is only to protect the tears from falling. Thank you for sharing your heart through your writing. I miss you and love you forever and ever. Love, your best sister in the world. HUGS.

    Sarah, I don't know how I missed reading your wonderful note until today. So glad I saw it when I did, by chance, or maybe because today the time is right to read your words to me. As I left the office, for the last time he said he knew I'd be fine. That I was smart and would do well at whatever was next. His words meant a lot to me, even in the tumult of emotion around those events. Yes, the wall protects me, even as it keeps me out of arms reach at times. I hate to cry. If the wall was all the way down I'm afraid The World would trample over me. I miss you too. More for having had you next to me for too short a time as always. So glad you came Home to Illinois for a visit, that always goes by too fast. Love you forever too, Sweet Sister Of Mine. Oodles and oodles, and I'm not hungry for noodles. Love, Janean

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