Thou art with me

  
THIS DESCRIBES MY KITTEN, PANZER! He has snuck past Blue dog’s self appointed guard post at the top of the basement stairs TWICE in recent days! The first time I found the cat on the stove while Blue kept staring down the basement staircase not knowing he and Panzer were on the same floor in adjacent rooms. The second time we realized Panzer wasn’t in the basement I took Blue out for a walk while my oldest son shook the cat food bag until he found the kitten upstairs in my room.   

 The stare down. 

Psalm 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

March 20, 2016

permission granted

  
I said yes to myself today. Yes to the most beautiful, fragrant, lavender roses with red edged tips. Unique and lovely, they eased the unexpected ache inside. I put them in my cart knowing they were not on sale, and more expensive at $10 than the clearance grocery store bouquets I usually give myself permission to buy. I needed them. More than I realized until after I placed them in a clear glass vase upon the solid oak kitchen table. Ever since, these unique, two-tone roses have been filling the room with a pleasant perfume in lieu of the wet dog, teenage boy and other non-rose scents that often linger. I needed them today, this bouquet, more than I knew. Ahhh. Much better. 

March 13, 2016

100

Happy 100th birthday in Heaven, Grr. I can hear your fiddle music playing at your birthday square dance and see Grandma smiling. Have fun calling, “chase the rabbit, chase the squirrel, chase the girl around the world.” You did. Thinking of you. Wearing my cowgirl boots for the first time this fall. Tell Copper and Santas I said hi too. Scratch their ears in the spots they liked. I am hoping that an unadvertised good thing about Heaven is: No Horseflies. Love you. Thinking of you extra today. Smiling, not crying. Just a little misty around the corners, like you when you’d hear music playing in your mind as you told a story from long ago. Love, Janean

Mother’s Day

The birds serenaded Blue and I on our early morning walk. Thankfully the pouring rain from earlier had stopped, though we’d have walked anyway. Enjoying breakfast now and some quiet time before the boys wake up. I love being their mom. My oldest son gave me my Mother’s Day gift early by going to the Good Friday artist reception and service in April. My younger son wrote me a poem that I’m not supposed to know about, but I saw the rough draft on accident while looking for his weekly report. Since he was out sick three days last week his awesome teacher sent it home with Friday’s homework with a post-it, “For Andrew’s Eyes Only :-)” I didn’t peek! Hope everyone I know has a blessed day filled with abundant love that overflows. Hug each other close. I had no idea how much my parents loved me until I became a mom. I get it now. Love that knows no bounds.

May 10, 2015

wolf whispers

on the train
heading home
lost in my own thoughts
my heart hurting
a sweet sound breaks through
that of a child howling
not crying, squalling, or fussing
howling
like a wolf at the moon
AH-OOO!
[but not too loudly]
it was a quieter, “ah-ooo”
made me smile
I peeked around my window seat and said aloud to the brown eyed boy behind me, “Is there a wolf back there?”
his eyes got bigger
as did his mother’s smile
I told him I like to howl like a wolf too
added that I have a big dog that looks like a wolf with a long nose and pointy ears and that he has a girlfriend that howled if he didn’t visit her fence fast enough when we went on walks
he has three dogs at home
one of them is named Luna
the same as Blue’s best girl
thankful for this brief moment
on the train taking me home
the day after a memorial service
for my grandfather
he was a moon howler too
great big, giant and loud, “AH-OOO!”
though for thoughtfulness of others
such as inside and on a train car
a quiet, nearly whispered, “ah-ooo”
I love you, Grandpa
Forever
your life’s work and legacy will live on
inside everyone who ever met and knew you and through your stories, music and poems
ah-ooo
ah-ooo
ah-ooo

April 12, 2015

chasing rainbows

IMG_5716.JPG

I have a prism hanging in my dining room window. The heat vent underneath the window is making the prism swing gently from side to side. It is an east facing window with morning light. Blue dog is chasing rainbows in the living room. Well, more like light swatches at the moment, that move across the floor to the furniture, walls and back to the floor again. I knew he liked chasing the cat’s laser light, flashlight beams and the sunlight glint from his collar tags. Now rainbows via prism light. Blue also stops to smell the flowers, takes me on startlit/moonlight walks and woofs to go out in time to catch the sunrise/sunset. May you have a blessed rainbow chasing day. Woof.

February 17, 2015