I am Thankful

I am Thankful
for the sunrise
colorful and bright
a fresh beginning
and the Hope
a New Day brings
with the Light

I am Thankful
for the birds that sing
a song that never ends
the breeze that blows
and whispers of the wind
flowers blooming
in colors bright
both outside and in

I am Thankful
for our family
Circling closer still
in this difficult time
standing shoulder to shoulder
stronger together

I am Thankful
for good friends
who bring cookies
two different kinds
who listen
with their hearts
reaching out
to give hugs
across the miles
and in person

I am Thankful
for play dates
for my children
Quiet in the house
and an afternoon nap

I am Thankful
for old fashioned mail
delivered to the house
cards and letters
handwritten notes
signed "Love"
and "Praying for you"

I am Thankful
for special teachers
who love my children
with great big hearts
filled with kindness
and compassion
sending notes
with poignant scripture
still teaching
in the summer
a gift once given
returns home again

I am Thankful
for God's promises
and His might

I am Thankful
for our church
so many prayers
shooting up to Heaven
on my husband's behalf
he grew up there
our children follow
walking in His footsteps

I am Thankful
for routine
breakfast, lunch and supper
dishes and laundry
groceries too
needs to be met
something to do

I am Thankful
for comfort food
dark chocolate
mac and cheese
ice cream
chicken noodle soup
and hot tea
that soothes
on the inside

I am Thankful
for Time Together
my family of four
watching TV
silly jokes
sleeping side by side

I am Thankful
for laughter
my children's
my husband's too
music for the ears
a balm for the soul

I am Thankful
for hot showers
and bathroom doors
that lock
a place to cry
away from little eyes

I am Thankful
for the silver moon
glowing in the sky
changing shapes
throughout the month
to show time passing by

I am Thankful
even now
especially now
for all the Little Things
I am Thankful

A Kitchen Poem. I began writing it yesterday, on June 21, 2011, around 11:00 p.m., and finished this morning early. Initially written longhand in pencil on the turquoise colored grocery list paper. The words were tumbling in my head as I ate a late night snack standing up in the kitchen before heading upstairs to bed. Yesterday was Quite The Day as we met with the oncologist for the first time. ‎My favorite quotes from the doctor at this initial appointment were, "You're young. You should tolerate it well. You have a good chance of being cured." AND "We'll get you through this." I'd like to politely add, "Yes, Please" and "Thank you."

The "Lily" and "Peace and Love Dove" note cards are paintings by Sheila Allen. My children each gave a set of note cards to their teachers at Christmastime. A gift given returned home as a blessing. Learn more about Sheila and her artwork at:

© 2011, Janean Baird Turquoise Tangles


16 thoughts on “I am Thankful

  1. Anonymous writes:When I saw the pics of the two cards, I immediately knew it was from the same artist…and I thought how cool is that…2 cards from the same artists being sent to your family. However, it got a little cooler upon further reading that these cards were gifts from you and that have come back to you. Amazing. 🙂 I enjoy reading your poetry…it's so honest, thoughtful, moving, raw and emotional. It's deeply personal, but so true life. It moves me. Reading it has made me a better person…I'm so much more reflective of what's going on in my life and better able to share my own feelings and emotions. Thanks~Take care, Janean. I hope you have a beautiful day that's full of love, joy and lots and lots of laughter. :)~JEN MILLER

  2. Jen, THANK YOU for sharing that with me! Ironically, I share my thoughts and emotions better on paper than in person. Not to say I'm not a talker but I can play it close too. Just hit a point where holding it all in was hurting more than breaking down the walls and setting it free. THIS is so much better. We have love and joy today and some laughter too. Just got another bombshell that we could have done without. Time will tell. Doctors and tests. Just have to keep on fighting. ~ Janean

  3. Anonymous writes:"written longhand in pencil on the turquoise colored grocery list paper"Janean,Turquoise Tangles becomes ever more prophetic.You are exercising your gratitude muscles. Good workout!Love from Auntie J.Janet Riehl

  4. lokutus-prime

    Janean, we have only just 'met' and I have received joy in reading your poetry. Now, having read this post, I am thankful that quiet courage such as yours gives hope and inspiration to others. Much of what Jen has said is what I feel in reading all that you have posted here. You share your thoughts and emotions on paper in a way that reaches out. I am moved by all that I read here. Thank you Janean.

  5. Aunt Janet, It's your encouragement in whispers and nudges the past few years. Your voice saying, "write…write…WRITE….WRITE!!!!!!" that finally has come to fruition in what is pouring out of me now. Thank you for knowing me so well. Love, Janean

  6. John, Thank you for reading. I know you've clicked around some other posts here at Turquoise Tangles. The post that sheds some light on the oncologist visit is this one, "Too Young For This". http://my.opera.com/jbaird/blog/2011/06/03/too-young-for-thisIt's my husband with the cancer. diagnosis At 40 years old. Yesterday afternoon we heard it may have spread. Meaning it'd be at stage 4. The doctors are fighting with us. They keep saying, "at your age" and are planing the harder course of treatment and talk about being cured. It's from the place the poetry is coming from. Much like the way David cried out to the Lord in the Psalms. Not to compare myself to God given scripture. Just the highs and low from despair to jubilation that David wrote of so eloquently thousands of years ago. ~ Janean

  7. lokutus-prime

    Janean,Thank you, I will go read the post. My immediate thoughts, are .. in the revelation of what is happening how can I, a stranger, express my feelings to you? I will tell you simply that I send my prayers and my Hope for your husband and for you and all your loved ones. I can see in your poetry the strength of your feelings and the power that moves you to write about all of this. I believe that we (most of us..and I hope many of us) experience jubilation in our lives and jubilation is kin to Hope and it is Hope and our trust and our belief that gives us strength. Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers.John Originally posted by jbaird:

    Just the highs and low from despair to jubilation that David wrote of so eloquently thousands of years ago.

  8. John,Thank you for your prayers for my husband. A man you've never met. Originally posted by lokutus-prime:

    Janean,I can see in your poetry the strength of your feelings and the power that moves you to write about all of this.

    Wring about this tumult of emotion is so good for me right now. Makes me feel stronger. On the inside. Where I need it most. Joy and Hope are two of my most favorite things in the Whole Wide World. Love Tops The List. ~ Janean

  9. Thank you for your kind words, garytuman. Yes. I Hope.

  10. Great poem,there is alway hope for what you want most,like all the simple things in life are sometimes the hardest to get.i hope the great spirit hears and helps you

  11. beautiful. transparent. sharing with all who see…reading, am blessed.

  12. Originally posted by studio41:

    beautiful. transparent. sharing with all who see…reading, am blessed.

    Thank you for reading, Jill. Writing has helped me navigate the stormy waters of my husband's cancer fight. The pendulum swings back and forth from despair to joy and back again.The ship rocks to and fro through the waves. We've learned to savor those rare moments when the pendulum stops swinging and the ship is still, upon calm water. Hope hasn't left us. Neither has Faith. We're holding on to each other and facing Whatever Is Next…TOGETHER. So thankful for THAT!Love,Janean

  13. How's it coming along, kid? How's he holding up, and how are you holding up?

  14. Originally posted by derWandersmann:

    How's it coming along, kid? How's he holding up, and how are you holding up?

    dW,It's coming along better-ish. Chemo this week and the HOPE that this is the last treatment either ever or for awhile. More scans will be done. Another surgery is on the horizon, timing is vague right now. He's A Tough Guy. USMC Reserve/Police Officer Tough. Even though I met him in art class at college where he graduated with a BFA a year before I did. I'm holding up OK. Some days better than others. Laughing and smiling through the tears. Finding JOY where it is offered, like in the warmth of the sun, or just the fact it's glowing and not hiding behind a cloud.I'm not military or law enforcement tough.In my family it's known as, "Thompson Grit."From my grandfather and grandmother and the generations of tough that came before. Just keep moving forward. Don't stop. Day by day. Moment by moment. Appreciating the time we have in the here and now.I know you know. ~ Janean

  15. Good. If you need a place to vent, you know where I am … it's a heavy load to carry.If you need some decidedly non-conventional thought, that might be of some comfort, I've got it in bushels, but it takes a bit of getting used to. My Cherokee friends think I'm a shaman, and maybe they're right … my wife says she sees a tall Indian man looking over my shoulder (whispering in my ear, I suspect). I don't see these things, but I do "know" that things are never as bleak as we perceive them.

  16. Originally posted by derWandersmann:

    I do "know" that things are never as bleak as we perceive them.

    dW,Thank you for your whole note, but especially your closing sentence. I'm learning this. My cousin tells me again and again we're surrounded by an ocean of love. I can see it in my mind. My dear artist friend, Angel, says, "There is a symphony of prayers being said for you and your family."We are so blessed.Even in the midst of this stupid, awful, tangled up, cancer journey that neither of us saw coming a year and a half ago when my husband was only 40. He's 42 now. I'm a month and a few days away from 41. We're surviving. Living. Loving. Making the best of it, on the good days. You're remarkable and I'm so thankful our paths crisscrossed here on Opera for the words and images that soothe weary, hurting, burdened, souls on the hard days, and cause big guffaws of laughter on the easier ones. Best,Janean

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