“Hello little mouse.
Welcome home to your house.”
Words I said to my youngest son as we met at the top of the stairs.
He’d just returned home from an overnight with friends.
He was walking up.
I was about to descend after starting a load of laundry.
He was almost to his bedroom with a twin pack of Little Debbie snack cakes in his hand.
He hadn’t gotten there quite fast enough.
He replied with a grin and attempted a Jedi mind trick with the words, “You didn’t see anything.”
Oh, but I did.
The pantry is self serve and holds a plethora of goodies.
If only the food refilled automatically…
Though from his point of view, it does.
Gradually, when favorites are “disappeared” from one too many mouse raids, the children are learning to recycle the empty boxes and tell me if something is nearly or completely gone.
[creak of pantry door]
[tip toe tip toe away]
[crinkle of the wrapper]
[mmmmm so yum]
NOTE TO MOUSE: Throw the “evidence” away.
March 15, 2015
This conversation really occurred at the top of the stairs around 10:30 this morning. Afterwards I checked the pantry and there is at least one unopened box of Little Debbie snack cakes remaining. My oldest son calls this particular flavor, “Heaven Bites.” They must be really, REALLY good!
Boys are awake. I was sitting next to my youngest in living room. We hear his big brother shout from the kitchen, “Stupid pickles!” Pause and then ask what happened, not sure if he was in the pantry or fridge. TEENAGER replies he was trying to get pizza for breakfast and the box was “perched precariously.” The jar fell on his foot. The pickles are OK. So is he. Pizza is being eaten. Here I figured he’d go for leftover cake.
May 24, 2014
Saturday morning just a little after 7am
So, there was a little hostage situation here last night…
My youngest son, age 10 in fifth grade, asked for the yardstick to measure the dog’s long, fluffy tail. When I didn’t immediately hand it over to him, he began taking items out of the pantry one by one, reading their labels aloud, stacking them on the kitchen counter as he stockpiled hostages. Along the way he found the yardstick and Blue did NOT want his tail measured, so my boy resumed taking pantry items hostage. Not just the extra food, also batteries, straws, flashlights, lightbulbs and the broom. Then, since I made white chicken chili yesterday, and the crock pot found itself surrounded by other hostages, that boy blocked his captives off with the yardstick and declared the crock pot hostage too. What?! The crock pot was an innocent bystander! Just sitting on the counter, minding it’s own business, after working hard all day, when it found itself surrounded by hostages and a crazed madman brandishing a yardstick about. Too funny really, both in the moment and as hindsight. Love him. The older boy too. He had his own smiling, trying to get my goat, way of pushing buttons last night. His grin said he knew he did too. My narrowed eyes didn’t convince him to move because my grin gave me away. He showered. Such a simple thing, but heaven forbid it be one. Thursday morning now. The sun rose. Both of my sons rose too, even though they were still rather tired, grumbly and wanting more sleep. Oldest is delivered to school and youngest is en route. Blue has been out twice. Time is 8:30am. I stayed in my flannel pjs and am making coffee now. Errands and cat duty and miscellaneous whatnot will all fill in the hours until those two boys who hold their mother’s heart return home again. I may have agreed to make a chocolate cake last night to free the hostages. I sort of think I did. I better make one, to appease that crazed madman, age 10.
January 30, 2014
There is a new moon tonight. The second new moon of January 2014. There are two super moons this month, on the first and thirtieth, but actually, there were three because of the full moon in the middle. I have a feeling “moon effect” had a little to do with the antics at my house last night. The rest was a very creative, witty and hilarious way to avoid bedtime.
My ten year old son just said to me from the kitchen, “I have the olives as hostage, until you tell me where the yard stick is.”
(I’m laughing in reply.)
“I took the olives first because I know you like them best.”
“I took the whole pantry hostage.”
“No more large pitted olives from the pearl company.”
“No more mini moos half and half”
“No more honey, grade A.”
(A longer list goes here that I didn’t all type.)
“Tell me where the yardstick is and you’ll have all these objects back.”
“No more cake mixes, Mom.”
(Oh…there’s more…it’s not bedtime or anything. Maybe I should give him the yardstick?! He wants it to measure Blue’s tail.)
“Let’s see what else I should take for ransom…”
“I have the battery charger on ransom.”
“No more white distilled vinegar.”
“Where’s the yardstick?!
(Answers his own question) “Oh. Found it.”
(To the dog) “Hey, Blue, can you lay down?”
“No more mini marshmallows.”
“No more dark chocolate.”
“No hot traditional salsa. Even though I don’t see anything hot about it.”
“No more brooms.”
“No more measuring cup.”
Me: “That’s to measure Blue’s food with.”
10 year old: “Well, you’ll have to guess now!”
This is where the pantry hostage taking standoff ended at 9:27pm. That is when I walked into the kitchen from the family room to see all the items he held hostage from the pantry stacked on the counter. Tomorrow is soon enough to shove them all back in. By 9:41pm my youngest son was tucked into bed with his covers all straightened out from last nights acrobatic sleeping and the bedside light on. Never a dull moment. I’m so glad!
January 29, 2014
I’ve stayed out of the boxes of Swiss Rolls in the pantry. They are for the boys of the house. However, this poor l’il Swiss Roll duo traveled round trip, all the way to school and back. It returned home uneaten, due to a fundraiser bake sale. Well, you know I took pity on it, I didn’t wanna waste, and no one else would eat a less than perfect looking one…. So, OK OK, these two I ate! Yum.
March 8, 2013
I had fun printing out poems and snippets of thoughts about my Blue dog last night. This morning I put them in a 3-ring binder for my Grandpa with a pic on the cover and the title, “The Blue Collection.” A belated gift for my poet, story telling, fiddlin’ Grandpa.
I’m taking the last last jar of Alien Goo to him too, a.k.a. Green Tomato Pickles. I found ‘em hiding in the back of the pantry. Here I thought I’d delivered that last jar in November, when I made a trip via southbound train, the day before his 97th birthday.
Turns out I have a thing for packin’ pickles on the train. For I’m ridin’ the rails again today, but not alone, for my magical sister is sittin’ alongside me. We are not talkin’ as much as I expected. Just sorta chillin’ and enjoyin’ sittin’ quietly, playin’ on our idevices.
It is a beautiful day. A blue sky one, without any clouds in it. Oh, so lovely.
January 16, 2013
Today I wish Martha Stewart lived here because I have ants in the pantry which flips me out and makes me want to scream and it’s not like I don’t have anything else to do, like, oh, yeah, MAKE ART! Good morning. *sigh* ~ Janean
August 23, 2012