June 7, 2012

again

doc had some news
yesterday
a little good
nothing in the lung
praise be
a lot not easy to hear
metabolic in the liver
again
perhaps surgery
again
maybe more chemo
maybe wait and see
next step
specialist in Chicago
again
not the news we wanted
just seven months
since first liver surgery
when doc thought
they got it all
but thankful
he’s still here
with us
tougher
than he knows
the former Marine
police officer
I married
15 years ago

June 7, 2012

June 6, 2012 Image

up since 5:00
one cup o’coffee down
a bowl of cereal too
almost 6:30 now
as I laugh and throw the ball for Blue
his appointment is at 8:30
that wonderful husband of mine
for 15 years and counting
20 years together in July
friends before that
today we find out
if the chemo has worked
or if the cancer has spread
yet here I am
playing with the dog
his dog
the one he’s always wanted
trying to keep the worries and fear at bay
until we know what the doctor has to say
other than THAT
it’s a beautiful morning
crisp early a.m. air
birdsong from the treetops
not much traffic noise
less than two hours to go
and then we’ll know
what’s next

June 6, 2012

May 31, 2012

a quiet house

I hear birdsong from the front yard

and rain sounds from the back

the quiet whir of the ceiling fan above

with a napping dog on the floor

the silver keys are tapping

beneath my flying fingertips

I’m still in pajamas 

even though it’s well past lunch

ah, yes, my favorite kind of day

breathe in

breathe out

just drinking in

the sounds of a quiet house

for the children

are with their Papa

May 28, 2012 Image

there is a crow
I just now spied
heckling the dog and I
with cawing
that never ends
I much prefer
early morning silence
other than the jingling
from my pup’s collar
caw caw caw
on a repetitive loop
I didn’t
get out of bed
for this
woof
awoke me
from a bizarre dream
in full color
a jumble of images
and me
in a place
I didn’t want to be
awake is better
even if it’s early
even if the crow
needs to stop
and fly away now
my eyes gritty
from tears cried
yesterday
ahhhhhhh
some actual birdsong
bye bye Mr. Crow
I didn’t even
resort to violence
though I considered
my options
he must have realized
not to mess with me
as I have no patience
for cawing
that never ends

May 28, 2012
written somewhere in the 5 o’clock a.m. hour
damn crow