husband
it is a crazy daisy kind of day
oldest son feverish and flu-ish
husband getting unhooked from 48 hours of chemo around noon
getting groceries in the six o’clock hour
that’s a.m.
I smile as I spy them in the bin
as I round the corner toward produce
the bin where all the half price bouquets go to wait
for the right shopper
the one who stops and takes a look
taking time to admire the varied assortment of grocery store flowers
oodles of crazy daisies
figuring it is $3.49 well spent
they are the first thing I put in my cart
even though they are never on the list
I head home by seven
as the sky begins to brighten
they are arranged in a vase on the kitchen counter
it is a clear vase, but they turn the water purple
I love that
coffee is done brewing
husband is out the door
time to get breakfast
not sure what is after that
sinking into home today
reading my new book from the library
making it up as we go along
yes, it is a crazy daisy kind of day here
A Clarity of Conscious: My Armor
My armor
For most of recent life I’ve worn armor,
To protect from bullets and blast,
While in the service and with the force,
Until the danger passed.The armor then would be removed,
Until the next shift or fray,
Hung in a locker or stowed with my gear,
Ready no matter the day.But…
Dear You,
You got it.
Whatever you need.
I can’t read your mind.
Guess I missed your subtlety.
Thank Heaven for Tumblr.
So our hearts can have this conversation.
Love,
Me
Evanescence
Evanescence is a gradual thing,
Nearly imperceptible to the human eye.Small pieces simply blend into the background clutter,
Blurring what were distinct lines.Subtly the erosion continues,
Widening the gulf between the present and the absent.A larger world, hardly noticing or caring
Of what is being lost, continues on without skipping a beat.And eventually the foreground and background
Blend seamlessly around what once was there,But now is…
Nothing
I read this poem last night.
When I stalked your page, the way you stake out mine.
You taught me a new word in the process, Mr. Scrabble.
And made my heart hurt.
I hate that you feel this way.
I can read between the lines.
Is it because I put together the Star Wars thing?
And that is usually your job?
I just knew you were tired.
From working all day.
From giving blood before chemo again.
From Making An Appearance.
I was trying to help.
I made it worse.
Par for the course it seems.
You are here.
You are with us.
We are so thankful for that.
Every day you’re here.
Cancer can’t have you.
You are going to beat it.
We’re going for the cure.
You are going to beat it.
(Because it bears repeating.)
I love you damn it.
SO BIG!
Sorry I am a mess at showing you…
even after all the years we’ve been together.
You’d think we’d have it down by now.
Today is a new day.
Screw evanescence.
It’s for steam and fog.
Not people.
You are here.
Very much with us.
And we are thankful.
1. (noun) evanescence: the event of fading and gradually vanishing from sight; “the evanescence of the morning mist”
© Turquoise Tangles, in reply to aclarityofconscious
December 21, 2011
Today is the last day of school for my children before Christmas Break begins.
That means there are 6,000 things to think of and try to do before they are home and out of school before Christmas.
Life has been a whirlwind lately, of this, that, and the other, and how I wish I had one more day before their school break.
As it is, I am helping set up the food in 6th grade at 11:40.
My oldest son volunteered us to bring fudge, which my husband and I made together last night before bed.
At 1:00 I am helping in 3rd grade, having prepped an animal snowflake craft for 27 students a few nights ago.
In between now (8:50 a.m.) and 11:40 when I am due at school I am going to eat breakfast, get cleaned up, go to Target, the bank, the grocery store, make one or two more stops and then come home before leaving for school between 11:00 and 11:15.
I will be so ready to be HOME at 3:00 when the school day is done.
My oldest son has a shopping date with his grandparents.
Then church tonight.
I have no idea what’s for supper.
I ruined supper last night, literally pouring it down the drain on accident.
The colander lid wasn’t locked onto the saucepan and all the spaghetti noodles slid from the pan into the sink and down the garbage disposal too fast to grab any back and serve ‘em.
So, instead of spaghetti for supper, my youngest son had a plate of reheated pancakes, my oldest son had two hot dogs and a slice of garlic bread, my husband had an apple turnover and glass of milk and I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and cheez-its.
*sigh*
I am thankful for food to eat and Plan B, that saved the day, once again.
This is why I haven’t been tumblin’ much.
Life is busy, in a good way, and I haven’t had time to daydream, the source of poetry.
At least mine.
I need time to gaze at sunrises and sunsets.
Time to listen to the clock tick with nothing pressing that needs to be done NOW!
Those quiet moments in the days ahead aren’t likely, but I’ll do the best I can to find them and savor them when they happen.
There is lots of Energetic Christmas Is Coming Boy Commotion in my future.
Lookin’ forward to it.
Merry Christmas to you…just in case I’m not back before December 25, 2011.
Love,
Janean
Love, Me
Dear Mr. Attentive, You are freaking me out. Not that I am complaining. It just takes some getting used to. In a good way. Love, Me
today’s the day
today’s the day I show my art
the pieces that have had my laser focus
for the past few days
I still can’t believe I said, “Yes” so fast
without anything ready to show
with a week’s notice
and other activities scheduled as well
amazingly it all came together
with my husband’s help
and encouragement
mostly he gave me the space
to create
and only called me stubborn once
I owned it and agreed
I kept saying, “This just feels
like too good
of an opportunity
to miss”
he understood
he did
and now
excited
scared
and nervous
sums up the jangle in my stomach
details to see to
things to do
one more piece of artwork
to finish and get framed
first thing this morning
because
today’s the day
YIKES!
© Turquoise Tangles
December 13, 2011: Love is…
Love is saying this morning, “I’ll take the boys to school and then go to Meijer,” because you know I’m trying to finish some artwork for a one day show tomorrow that I’m simultaneously excited, nervous and freaked out about, even though you re-start chemo today and have your own set of nerves about that.
Turquoise Tangles 