6:57am
School is on here. The phone call last night and the email from the public school announcing a one hour late start had the best wording. Funny thing is, they sent the email in bigger, red colored type too. I think they really wanted to cancel again due to subzero temps. It is -6, feels like -20. Life goes on and school must to. I get it.
No driveway drifting overnight. I needed that l’il “win.” Blue is taken care of now. Sidewalk needs a l’il help, then back in to rouse the oldest boy, with dynamite if needed. I opened his blinds already. Sunlight. Expose the teenager to sunlight. Step one. šŸ™‚
There is color in the sunrise. Warm looking yellows and golds. An illusion. It is snot freezing cold. So much for poetic…there’s the blunt as hell. šŸ˜‰
Heading back outside now. Not quite Hoth-like. Blue could walk on all four paws.

February 6, 2014

I am sitting on the ledge.
Waiting.
Wishing.
Hoping, for anybody to come save me.
But they didn’t.
They never came.
Instead, they waited for me to jump.

PoorGirlRichWoman.tumblr.com (via poorgirlrichwoman)

That is when you decide you just needed some quiet time and a bird’s eye view to give you a new perspective. Things aren’t as dire and dark as they momentarily appeared. You already have the courage, strength and stamina to save yourself. You are brave and strong. There is a beacon of hope within that nothing can snuff out. It is time to begin again, soaring like an eagle. You discover you prefer this sky high view, closer to the clouds. Birds of a feather flock together. I’ll meet you in the air. *chirp*

Suicide is never the answer. You don’t get to choose your last day. Only God knows when it will be. You have today. Life is a gift. LIVE IT. You are never all alone. The God of the Universe is always as close as a prayer. He is available 24/7. Talk to Him if you can’t bring yourself to phone a friend. Please. I beg you.

January 19, 2014

back to routine

7:27am
-Blue gave up fussing about not being able to see his dog buddy Jake, and decided to just eat breakfast instead.
-8th grade boy was shocked, amazed and thrilled to find a new MythBusters on the DVR this morning. You see, it’s not just a new MythBusters, but A NEW STAR WARS MYTHBUSTERS!!!! Are you kidding me?! Pure awesome right there.
-Best of all, thanks to the folks at Discovery Channel, that TV show was the incentive my 5th grade boy needed to come out from under the layers of cozy covers where he was burrowed when I told him it was wake up time, a little after 7a.
Up, dressed, breakfast, backpacks with lunches packed…we just might make it.
7:33am now
Gotta go!

The words above were posted in real time as my Facebook status. It is 8:24am as I post them here at Tumblr. I just walked through my front door, after delivering one boy curbside and waiting with the other until the bus arrived. It did. *whew* My breakfast time is next. Coffee. Taking my mom to the train station mid morning. I have a whisper of an idea for how I’m going to spend my day, but I’m not yet telling. Wednesday today. All day. Going to make it A Good One! First step is taking my winter coat off. I’m holding my phone with a turquoise knitted glove and typing with my thumb. I will. Letting the words flow ā€˜til then…

weather texting

KRB: Gdnt. Ly.

Love you too
It started snowing
Gently
Lightly
Pretty l’il flakes
Nothing that seems menacing

January 4, 2014
10:40pm
We’ll know more in the morning
Predictions made for the amount of snowfall and subzero temps had people buying groceries until the shelves were literally empty
I stayed home
Evening napped
We have enough
Even if we are snowed in for a few days and run out of stuff
We’ll be OK
My boys and I
Human and canine kind
Cat too
We’re “all good”
Goodnight

vivid crazy daisy blooms
and a shamrock plant for luck
are the flora and fauna
keeping me company
in the kitchen
plants hold down the counter top
I hold down the sink edge
elbows propped up
leaning, typing, thinking
as I pause just a moment
to daydream and woolgather
before moving the dirty dishes
along to the dishwasher
as happy voices drift up
my boys are playing in the basement
after visiting the kitchen for food
(thus, the dishes)
Blue dog is alternately napping
and wild front window woofing
‘cause the new neighbor
is having a moving party
the street is lined
with pick up trucks
my brother and his son
are coming over later
in this very moment
life is good
thankful and blessed
smiling a l’il brighter
thanks to a bouquet of
vivid crazy daisies
and a shamrock plant for luck
that I’ve kept alive
for nearly a whole year
I’m still here too
not sure what to do next
never had coffee today
wishing for a nap

January 4, 2014

1. I can’t get up at the crack of dawn to carpe fucking diem because I’m out five nights a week chasing laughter and the moonlight.

2. I don’t want to wake up feeling comfortable. Fuck comfort. I want to wake up and know I’ve woken up, I want to feel my life as it happens and if that means a throbbing headache, so be it; I’d rather dance in the dark than under a rainbow.

3. Eat whatever you want, idiots.

4. My breakfast happens at 1pm and I’d like to read whilst I eat it, thankyou very much.

5. I don’t need to stretch, nor do I need to reach for the sky; I am not a member of S Club 7 and my head is already in the clouds.

6. Drink all the water your body needs, put a chopped up lemon in your bottle but never neglect iced tea and vodka – whatever your poison, indulge yourself in it sometimes. Striving for perfection in any aspect of your life is just going to disappoint you; have a shot every now and then.

7. If you’re living life, you might not have time to write down your activities until four in the morning. Your life record may be scribbled onto receipts as you ride the train. That’s okay too; it doesn’t have to be beautiful to be valid.

8. Sleep on a pile of towels if you have to. Sleep in the grass. Sleep at a new friends’ place every night. As long as you’re sleeping next to something you love – whether it be a partner or the latest Palahniuk – scented fabric softener won’t mean shit.

9. Chaos can be better sometimes.

10. Run into the ocean instead.

11. You don’t owe strangers your smile. You don’t owe nature your observation. Maybe you don’t have a dog to walk.

12. Don’t make plans you can’t follow through with, it’s unfair.

13.

14. Fuck it. Pick up a book because you liked the cover. Pick up a book because the person before you keft it behind. Scribble all over it if you want. Tear pages out and cut out words if you want. Pick up no books for a month, then ten in a day. Books will always be there.

15. Be yourself without imposing cliche’d values and movie-romance ideas onto your personality. Do what comes naturally. If you don’t want to pay your speeding fines, don’t fucking pay them, it’s your life. If you don’t like old people, don’t go and volunteer at their homes, you’ll only make everyone there miserable. Find your true bliss rather than assuming you’ll know what it is by sticking your tongue out at babies. You’ll get there, there’s no rush.

16. Don’t fucking daydream about it. Do it. Write your own ending.

Fuck Your ā€˜Sixteen Small Steps to Happiness’, love Daisy Lola (via spearmintblonde)

Thirteen must have been left intentionally blank, either for us to write our own, or as a reminder that what happens next is a mystery, right up until the moment when whatever “it” is occurs. Learn to embrace the moment, even the kitchen sink leaning, woolgathering ones. ~Crazy Daisy Me

January 4, 2014

turquoisetangle:

poetdreamer:

bochebelaila:

KintsugiĀ (é‡‘ē¶™ćŽ), meaning ā€œgolden joinery,ā€ is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery using gold. It restores functionality to a broken vessel, and not only adds beauty and worth, it turns destruction and damage into the most valuable part of the piece. The scars of the past are notĀ erasedĀ  or hidden away, to beĀ ashamedĀ of – they are transformed, immortalizedĀ in gold.

How many times have I felt as if I could hold no more water – like a dry cistern? How many times have I felt parched as dust from a cracked vessel? As many times as I have felt like pieces of me have been lost or torn away, and as many times as I have cried over how broken I have become. Yet, with time, patience, hard work, and the touch of a Master craftsman, I may yet be restored.

A reminder for us all. Yes, life changes us, even sometimes breaks us. But those breaks can be stronger and more beautiful if we heal them with art. Fill the breaks with poetry, paint the cracks with art. Take the time and be stronger for it.

Thank you for this. I needed to see it today.

I first reblogged this post by another in December 2012. I’m reblogging it again today, just over a year later, on January 1, 2014. I just emailed this photograph of repaired pottery with beautiful words to my sister with the subject line, ā€œWe’re glued back together with GOLD.ā€ She needed to read it too, because of this text reply she sent to me earlier today, ā€œYup all the pieces are coming back together. I can see they are being glued carefully into place. So proud of you. That may seem silly but i am.ā€ Silly only because she is my younger sister, but not silly at all. I assured her I understood completely, and added that she and I are stronger together, connected by our ā€œall inā€ ginormous hearts, even though we’ve made our homes many states apart. Life goes on and so do we, wearing cowgirl boots with sass and kickass, though we have pleasing manners too. ā€˜Cause we’re Gary’s Girls and Patty Sunshine’s too. Damn straight. 2014 is The Year of the Horse and we’re ready to run the race, while setting our own pace.

January 1, 2014

to new beginnings

The first sunrise of 2014 was lavender and hot pink. Vivid, bright, streaks of pink, and me without my camera. Blue and I walked through the park. The only sounds his tags jingling, my cowgirl boot falls and one crow, but thankfully for just a l’il while. Shoo shoo. No cars. No joggers. Quiet, as the sky woke up with color. I didn’t look at the temperature before we set out. I looked at it just now: 17 degrees, feels like 2, and me without my scarf. Brisk, cold air and snow don’t bother me, though I’m not a fan of ice. I noticed we also have a winter storm advisory. OK. Sure. Whatever. I’m taking it as it comes, not fretting. Hello, 2014. I didn’t stay up to greet you at midnight, but I saw your first sunrise this morning, and it was as fabulous as the promise of this new year ahead. GOOD MORNING!

January 1, 2014
7:45am