sparkling snow
twinkling stars
glowing moon
just a sliver
of a crescent
smiling down
I grin back
snow glints
starlight
moonbeams
outside soothes
the ache inside
February 4, 2014
smile
Minecraft lesson #2
Week two of Xbox 360 Minecraft lessons from my sons. My youngest boy was my teacher today. He made, “Blow Crap Up World” and taught me how to use TNT. It is kinda fun… I’m grinning after playing for around thirty minutes, before saying, “Enough.” Cooking up some bacon for two sleepyheaded boys for breakfast next. My incentive to learn how to move better, with the foreign feeling controller, was that if I could track and catch him, I could have a dog. I caught him. Hearts appear. Now I have a virtual canine companion too. Cool. Minecraft has a dragon in a dark portal lair. My youngest son slayed him. Proud Mama here. Said aloud, “I’m not an Xbox Girl.” My sons think there is hope for me though. Well, of course there is. I’m A Hope Full Woman for sure. A long time ago, I played Frogger on Atari. I even remember when Pong was cool. Yes. I’m that freaking old, typed with a smile and a bubbling laugh, because at 42 I feel like I’m just getting started. I am.
January 19, 2014
smiles from the sidewalk
the line up at the bus stop
a glorious male cardinal
chirping from the treetops
that crazy fallen nest
is still resting on the sidewalk
I took another picture
I had to
it’s still there
Blue and Luna touching noses
then my big sweet boy
whispering in her pointed ear
chimes chime
I know not from where
not quite a gong
beautiful
melodic
wind chimes
that’s the sound of my drum
the one I march to
chimes chiming
a sound in the stillness
Blue tugs to cross the street
he sees a lucky dog
threefold lucky
a fenced yard
a frisbee
someone to throw it
and no restrictive leash
fourfold, I guess
back inside now
still smiling from the sidewalk
as I walk through my front door
the new one
with the bare tree
moulded in glass
a friend texts me
artwork from her classroom
snowmen and bare trees
I spy the crinkled snowman rug
Blue drags it around
I put it by the door
to catch snow slush
I reply with words
a smile
and end with
*happy sigh*
sharing my sidewalk smiles
with you
January 16, 2014
Today was Happy New Front Door Day here! I. So. LOVE. It. A bare tree. Meant to be. *lots of smiling and kitchen happy dancing going on*
December 23, 2013
like coke bottles
Teenage boy was up and at ‘em early today. We enjoyed sharing morning quiet time. Visiting. Breakfasting without a rush.
I went in to wake up ATB at 7:09am and said, “Last day of school before Christmas Vacation.” I sort of sing-songed it. I picked up his glasses to clean ‘em, from where they were sitting on the nightstand beside his bed. Sweet boy rolled over, while rubbing his eyes awake, and calmly said, “Mom, there are already coke bottles going off inside me.” Even after drinking my morning coffee I still had to ask, “Coke bottles?” My ten year old boy replied, “Mentos. Diet coke. Get it?!” Oh, yes. I so do. Christmastime is for children and grown ups who don’t really wanna be “adults” at all. Christmas is magic, excitement and lots of happy energy about to combust. It’s a feeling that, if you’re lucky, always stays with you. Joy that bubbles up from deep inside.
My first conversation of the morning was with a teacher on the sidewalk. It was sometime before 6am, maybe before 5am. I’m not sure of the time exactly. “Early” covers it completely. I was walking with my Blue dog. We were sort of lollygagging along. She had Blue’s best buddy, Jake, who was dancing at the end of his leash. We visited like the neighbors and friends we are, as the dogs romped and played. I said, “I’m praying for ALL the teachers today.” We shared a smile under the streetlights glow.
Now I know the fifth grade boy description of what it feels like: Every child has coke bottles inside them, you know, like mentos and diet coke. (I’m being sort of a grown up and resisting adding the “Duh.”)
I treated my younger boy a little bit today, by offering to drive him, instead of waiting in the drizzling rain to ride the bus per usual. He needed a little less rush too. By 8:40am both my sons were delivered safely to school.
Their days will go by fast. Mine will too. For this quiet moment though, while I catch my breath and plan, Blue is curled up next to me, each of us on our favorite halves of the family room love seat. I need to make a mega list and wrap up the remaining Christmas To Do. Best of all, I’ll be smiling about coke bottles while I do. Oh, how I love them, and rejoice in the gift of my two sons. Christmas time is about the birth of God’s Son. Long ago. In a land afar. Angels first foretold, then announced his birth. Shepherds followed a star. Wise men began the journey to meet him. Baby Jesus. Born of a virgin. Joseph the carpenter was there, beside the manger. His mother, Mary, pondered all these things in her heart. I’ve always loved that quiet little verse, nestled in Luke 2. I’m a heart ponderer too. Everything changes in a moment. My phone rang, Blue jumped down and front window wild woofed, only to return again to curl beside me, as I work to wrap this up. My heart squeezes, my eyes leak. Tears of joy and the ring of laughter intertwines with the ache of grief. Life goes on. Christmas is coming, whether I’m “ready” or not. I’ll be ready, well, ready enough. Joy. Peace. Hope. Love. Blessings. Thankfulness. The Gift of God’s Son. Christmastime. Like coke bottles going off inside. That covers all the important stuff.
December 20, 2013
Luke 2:19 “But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.”
Dear Mom,
Your grandsons and their/our neighborhood friends did you proud.
Love Your Oldest Daughter,
Janean
(Who has made lots of tracks in freshly fallen snow, Blue and me. I wrote a mini blog about it last night and titled it, “paws and boots.”
December 14, 2013
This is a Facebook note I wrote in reply to my mother who was lamenting all the newly fallen snow on her block without any children playing in it. She is a retired elementary school teacher, first third grade, but she spent most of her time teaching kindergarten. The magic and beauty of a new snowfall isn’t lost on her. She still greets snow with verve, sparkly eyed enthusiasm and the most dazzling of smiles.
this morning’s sunrise
color filled the sky
as I looked back
over my shoulder
waiting on that dog
this morning’s sunrise
I nearly missed it
considered shortcutting
skipping our usual park walk
so glad we took the long way
this morning’s sunrise
all the more beautiful
because of the still, quiet, calm
across a neighborhood
usually filled with busy sounds
this morning’s sunrise
I paused to take a photograph
a picture never does it justice
the color is richer
the pink truer
the clouds more fanciful
yet a photo catches the moment
when I removed my gray fleece glove
this morning’s sun rose
just a little before seven a.m.
the temperature was zero
my weather app said it felt like -15
cold
it was cold
Blue and I kept walking
on toward the park
moving closer to home
as the sky smiled
in shades of pink, lavender and blue
white sky now
a winter one
so glad I was up and at ‘em
and didn’t miss the glowing glory
of this morning’s sunrise
December 12, 2013
It is 10:26am now. Outside temperatures have warmed up to 12 degrees F, and it feels like -6 now. Warming up!
My youngest son slept in this morning. Sweet ten year old boy needed those extra zzzzz’s. The sound of his door creaking open from the top floor drifted down to where I stood in the kitchen. I smiled in anticipation even before I heard his joyful exclamation, “IT’S SNOWING!!!!!” He spied those tiny white flakes through the big picture window. I met him in the front door hallway. He hugged me. We stand nearly eye to eye. A few hours later, on the phone with my father, he told me my mother met the snowy morning in much the same way. Joy is all around us, especially in the simple things, those quiet moments, like a prolonged good morning hug that says, “I love you” without the actual words. Snowflakes are no longer dancing on the wind. My youngest boy has been window gazing periodically, still hopeful for a blizzard and no school snow days. Patience. Winter is just begun.
December 8, 2013
October soul balm
The sky is overcast today
Some rain is falling
Quiet drizzle
Not a storm raging
I love days like today
They calm and soothe me
No pressure to put a sunny smile on
I can just BE
October 15, 2013
- push yourself to get up before the rest of the world – start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise.
2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier – start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable.
3. erase processed food from your diet. start with no lollies, chips, biscuits, then erase pasta, rice, cereal, then bread. use the rule that if a child couldn’t identify what was in it, you don’t eat it.
4. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else.
5. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything.
6. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice.
7. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small.
8. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full.
9. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle.
10. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck.
11. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog.
12. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through.
14. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything.
15. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends.
16. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.
Sixteen Small Steps to Happiness (via asdfghjkllove)
I just emailed this post to my sister with the subject line, “I loved this and think you will too.” Best of all, I am already doing some of these things, making it feel less daunting to do a few more. ~Janean
Turquoise Tangles 