turn it upside down

One of my closest friends and I have been texting, literally since we both woke up today. This is nothing new between she and I…we both have A LOT to say! Best of all, we just say it. No holds barred. No walls.

So, at 8:40am, when she texted me a sad face 😦
I replied…
No sad faces
I have a f’ing rule!!!!
I cannot bear them
My heart is already breaking a zillion different ways
I’m making an egg and toast and coffee for me
Dog needs to stop woofing!
Or I could just go back to bed. Like all day.

That oh, so smart woman, a beyond marvelous friend, responded, “Do what works for u… :)”

A smile! Much better! That just helps me cope.

I wrote again to say:
Food
Art
I’ll be ok
Have a happy Florida day!

She believed me, for she knows me well enough to read my barometric pressure, even while on a l’il bit early Spring Break getaway, from more than a few states away.

It’s nearly 10:00am now. My breakfast has been consumed. First mug o’coffee is in my weary system too. I planned ahead and made an extra mug today. Knew I needed whatever amount o’kick in the arse it’d give me.
~ Janean

March 22, 2013

via text

Some mornings don’t go as planned.
^ That’s the understatement of the year, as every parent knows.

Things ran clockwork fine here, but my close, dear friend, well, that’s another story…
A private one mostly but had to do with car, truck, jeep trouble. Damn. All just while trying to get her children to school. Which she did (mostly) on time, because she’s not a quitter. Ever.

She texted her troubles. Summarized. She knows where a caring heart resides. Ended with, “Calgon…vodka…take me away!” Oh, how I heard her!

So, I saucily replied:
Oh, Vodka.
That blue bottle that I crave.
Not yet for me…
But I can mix and serve!
😉

We take turns making the other smile. ‘Cause that’s friendship at it’s finest. Love, prayer, propping up with hugs, kindness and laughter complete the lasting bond. Best of all, each of these, can be sent via text.

March 14, 2013

he’ll be 13 in April

My oldest son has so many good life skills at age 12 3/4. My mom has said, “he’s an old soul,” since he was an infant. I continue to marvel at him, and wonder what God’s plan is for my oldest boy. He is so articulate, knowledgeable about so many topics, and good with people of all ages. He has such compassion and empathy in him, balanced by an in depth knowledge of warfare throughout history and weaponry. Lots of scripture and Bible teaching are buried in his great big heart too. I just keep loving him and encouraging him in all things. Nudging now and then. Downplaying and not gushing to keep his head from swelling. He’s a builder, a dreamer, a planner, a thinker and I hope a doer too. I miss him, his little brother, that great big Blue dog and striped cat too.

Initially written as a text reply, on January 23, 2013, while sitting at my husband’s bedside at Loyola hospital near Chicago. My friend, whose oldest son is the same age (well, 14 days older), was praising my oldest son’s conversation skills. Saying that he speaks intelligently and clearly, and comes across as very knowledgeable and thoughtful. Of course my Mother’s Heart swelled with a bit o’pride. He is mine. Forever and always my baby he’ll be, even now when he towers head and shoulders over me. Not ‘cause he’s a GIANT, though he’s built broad for football, just ‘cause his mama isn’t tall…sayin’ I’m under 5’ is close enough.

abracadabra

Today I had a smiling, laughing, delicious lunch out with my sister and a mutual friend. Afterwards, my sister and I had an hour and forty five minutes to ourselves, so we went to mall. I now have a fabulous, new, longer, casual, walking the dog without freezing my hummingbird ass, winter coat in black AND a new gray scarf that sparkles because my sister insisted on it. ‘Cause even though she’s seven years younger than me, ya tend not to argue with her. The first coat we saw, the only one I tried on, fit like it was made for me. I’m still smiling and feeling mellow and THAT hasn’t happened in a long damn time. She’s magic.

January 15, 2013

funny story…

My best text of the day was a wrong number.

at 9:42am ? wrote:
Happy birthday gorgeous. Enjoy your day hope all’s well.

at 10:11am I replied:
Sweet message, but you sent it to a wrong number. Hope you resend to right person ASAP.

at 10:40am he (I’m assuming) wrote:
Ha my apologies.

I replied:
No problem 🙂

? wrote:
Btw who did I send this to?

I wrote back with my phone number, ‘cause if it were me, I’d want to know which digit I had wrong

? wrote:
New phone and carrier so flying blind. Sorry again whoever this may be 🙂

The small smile and quick laugh, that I shared with a friend, as I read the initial text aloud, added to the fun of it.

That sweet text though
I knew it wasn’t for me
Even if my birthday had been on January 13th
(And it’s not)

January 13, 2013

heart ache

my woman’s heart is breakin’
daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend
life’s been tough for awhile now
doin’ the best I can
cryin’ too many tears
day by day abidin’
movin’ ever forward
walkin’ step by step
thankful for the gift
of each day
we have together
holdin’ it all together
with bailin’ twine and prayers

November 25, 2012

October 16, 2012

my day ended much the same way it began

walking my dog beneath a dark, yet starlit sky

I woke too soon this morning

4-something instead of 5-ish

I tried to go back to sleep

by 4:45am I’d given up 

and murmured to my husband, “My brain’s awake.”

as I rolled out of bed

he wryly replied, “I don’t think it ever shuts down.”

perhaps not

there are those crazy dreams sometimes

the ones I remember in a vague, bizarre way

the day itself was a good one

drove my boys to school

and I went in with ‘em

spent the morning there

sittin’ in a 5th grade classroom

mounting Art Club art on colored paper

writing out title cards for each piece

then usin’ my three step stool

to hang this mini art show in the hall

in time for Grandparent’s Day on Thursday

home around 11 to walk Blue again

made a phone call, texted with a friend

ate some soup for lunch

napped

a luxury

set my phone alarm so I’d be up in time

to walk the dog again before school let out

picked up my children

fed my parent’s cats

home again

early supper

not a fancy one

make up soccer game at 5:30

for the one we didn’t play in the rain

the sunset was spectacular

my son’s team won the game too

home for the night this time

Blue and I went ‘round the block again

evening spent in the kitchen

dishes, bills, papers

then that last starlit walk

last one ‘til early mornin’ anyway

bedtime

everyone else is tucked in

my turn…now

‘night

Zzzzzzzzzzzz

October 16, 2012