honest love

My ten year old son says, “Hey Mom, wanna know why I’m glad you lost so many pounds?”
I ask, “Why?”
He responds, “Because there is less of you.”
I reply with a chuckle, “Thanks. It feels better to me too.”

November 7, 2013

Sunday afternoon

Sitting on the back patio now. In the shade to avoid sun glare on my laptop screen. Have the wind in my hair – a l’il breezy but overall not bad. My dog is keeping me company and my youngest son just joined me. I’d summoned him out of doors to have a conversation – about cussing…because he said if he could cuss it’d let some of his mad out. I hear that! So much like his mama the way he slams doors, stomps and grr’s. I call him my grizzly bear cub and sign notes to him, “Grizzly Bear Mama.”

April 14, 2013 

excerpt from personal email correspondance

he’ll be 13 in April

My oldest son has so many good life skills at age 12 3/4. My mom has said, “he’s an old soul,” since he was an infant. I continue to marvel at him, and wonder what God’s plan is for my oldest boy. He is so articulate, knowledgeable about so many topics, and good with people of all ages. He has such compassion and empathy in him, balanced by an in depth knowledge of warfare throughout history and weaponry. Lots of scripture and Bible teaching are buried in his great big heart too. I just keep loving him and encouraging him in all things. Nudging now and then. Downplaying and not gushing to keep his head from swelling. He’s a builder, a dreamer, a planner, a thinker and I hope a doer too. I miss him, his little brother, that great big Blue dog and striped cat too.

Initially written as a text reply, on January 23, 2013, while sitting at my husband’s bedside at Loyola hospital near Chicago. My friend, whose oldest son is the same age (well, 14 days older), was praising my oldest son’s conversation skills. Saying that he speaks intelligently and clearly, and comes across as very knowledgeable and thoughtful. Of course my Mother’s Heart swelled with a bit o’pride. He is mine. Forever and always my baby he’ll be, even now when he towers head and shoulders over me. Not ‘cause he’s a GIANT, though he’s built broad for football, just ‘cause his mama isn’t tall…sayin’ I’m under 5’ is close enough.

I very much enjoyed the ISU String Project concert this morning. My oldest son is the violinist third from the left in front. *yes I know he looks like a white and black spec, but it’s him* I tapped my booted toes, smiled my proud mama smile, sang along to The Monkey Song and took the ipad away from my youngest son for the three songs his big brother played.

I love my friends

I love my friends
Kim who makes me laugh until I snort without even trying, and no such thing as TMI between us
and Susan who pulls alongside the school curb, where I’m walking with my head down, after delivering two dozen brownies inside for a fundraising function we’re not attending tomorrow
she gets my attention with, “Hey, Sexy Mama”
my head comes up fast to see her smiling face and twinkling eyes from the driver’s seat of her familiar car
we talked in the shorthand of good friends as she rounded the sidewalk curve
for she has one more school drop off to do and then bags to pack
she’s flyin’ to South Carolina tomorrow
I’m seeing Angel and LizBeth later lunch-ish for some art business, but mostly friend business
for hugs and “to touch noses”
For face time, the live and in person kind
I’m seein’ more L’s tonight
chit chat with both Lynnette and Liann
with their families and mine
roastin’ hot dogs and marshmallows over a bonfire at my in law’s farm
e-communication has its place
but how I love talking, laughing and hugging in person so much more than simply typing, “LOL”, “hugs” and signing off emails with “Love”
for I truly do
Love my friends
~ Janean

September 28, 2012