Promise

milkshakesandheartaches:

I hope on the 

ashen stone

that will stand

above,

you will sing

me a song

of how much 

my life affected

thee.

Do not weep

or leave me

flowers that

will wither,

just promise

to bestow your

beauty for

those whose

eyes still see.

Yes. This. Thank you for writing it. Monday it will be six months since my husband died. “Sing a song” and “bestow beauty.” Life is happening now. We are to live it. Grieving is part of my/our journey. We loved. We mourn. We miss him. We remember. We are still alive. Speaking for my boys and I. So many loved and cared for him and prayed us through. Our family that we made together. We are thankful and blessed. Again and again. “Sing a song” and “bestow beauty.” Got it. Will do. Yes. This.

February 22, 2014

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a l’il bird song

The birds still serenaded the dog and I, even in the snow covered, early morn. I wish I spoke a l’il bird. I can only imagine the lyrics to their song. If I were a bird I’d croon…

What happened to yesterday?
Where did my blue skies go?
Spring was nearly springing
The earth was thawing
I woke up early to get my worm

Today the sky is cloudy
Things are murky overhead
This snow is unexpected
What the hell is coming next?

Here I perch upon the branches
Of the dormant, naked trees
Looking down toward the ground
What’s with this dumb ol’ white stuff?
It’s officially Spring
The robins are back in town!

It’s hard to not look back
I want to cry aloud
What happened to yesterday?
Where did my blue skies go?

Yet I know better than to ask
What the hell is coming next?
‘Cause it might be worse
Than just a l’il snow
There are much worse things
In Mother Nature’s bag o’tricks
People can wreak havoc too
Man made destruction
Is often the very worst
Yet even then
Nature can heal

Today I sit up in the treetops
Gray sky above
Snow covered ground below
I choose to lift my voice up
Toward Heaven
And ask not
What happened to yesterday?
Where did my blue skies go?
Instead I sing out clearly
Today is a new day
Celebrate
Rejoice
Savor the Gift O’Life
Hooray
I am still alive

Best of all
I’m not singing alone
Us birds
We flock together
In good times and bad
We share our bounty
We share our warmth
We share our l’il bird song
With you

May you enjoy today
savor life in this moment
Whatever it may bring
Tomorrow isn’t here yet
Blue skies will return
So will the sun
Though it may not bring warmth
There is still that gusting wind
The seasons are a changin’
Saying aloud
Time marches on

March 24, 2013

spring o’hope

damp sidewalk
from nighttime rain
brisk chill in the air
gray sky remains
no color
and yet
the birds are singing
trilling from the trees
beautiful
joyful
hopeful
birdsong fills me up
I smile broadly
and I mean it
from deep inside
my gut
I am a hopeful woman
for there is beauty
all around
hope springs eternal
like the songs
of those springtime birds

March 18, 2013

an Illinois observation

snow flurries dance upon the wind
bird song floats from the trees
the ground is nearly thawed
now the sun is shining
the flurries already gone
on this chilly March afternoon
must be spring in Illinois
when anything can happen
just talkin’ ‘bout the weather
it’s still Lion Time

March 12, 2013

I very much enjoyed the ISU String Project concert this morning. My oldest son is the violinist third from the left in front. *yes I know he looks like a white and black spec, but it’s him* I tapped my booted toes, smiled my proud mama smile, sang along to The Monkey Song and took the ipad away from my youngest son for the three songs his big brother played.

WOOF

I used to be the neighbor who grumbled about dogs that always barked.
Now I have one.
That’s irony.
My youngest son calls Blue a barkaroo.
He made up a song about it,
“Blue is the bark-a-roooo
of the cent-ur-eeee.”
Those are the only words, sung on a continuous loop in melodious nine year old boy lilt.
Of course I’m charmed.
He’s my fourth grade son, singing about our big sweet pup who still needs to learn some volume control.
That’s love.
~ Janean

July 23, 2012