morning

July 21, 2012 Image

Dear Queen Anne,
I love your lace.
I always have.
Since childhood.
When I’d tuck a stem behind my ear and the delicate blooms would tickle my face.
I picked a dozen and wove the long stems into a crown, oblivious to the minute white petals in my hair long after the crown was gone.
I chose the prettiest blooms and presented them to my grandma in a great big bunch.
Flowers, flowers everywhere in her multilayered gardens, but the only one I was allowed to pick was your lace, Queen Anne.

Time passes.
That young girl, once so carefree, grew into a woman with a family of her own.
But I’m still me.
In the light of early morning, walking my sweet pup on a new path, I spied a familiar flower.
For I never could call it a weed, with a name as lovely as, “Queen Anne’s Lace.”
Hello my friend.
Thank you for waking up my memories, of those childhood days long gone.
My grandma is gone now too.
Smiling down from heaven as I snapped off a single bloom and kept on walking.
Heading home.
Puppy slowing down, pulling less, heeling more.
I know full well it’s against the rules to pick flowers in a public park, as they are there for everyone to enjoy.
I rationalized no one would miss one weed…
Even though in my heart I didn’t think it so.
Thank you for the beautiful, pure white, intricate blooms of your lace, Queen Anne.
I’ll be walking that way again and a flower may or may not follow me home again…
(Depending a bit on who is reading.)
Love,
Janean

July 21, 2012

July 15, 2012 Image

My oldest son thought it was hilarious when I said this morning, “I have a Giant Squid arm on my shoulder.” Mostly he’s just glad I’m sewing another aquatic animal, to test our most recent newspaper pattern, for his 4-H project due in approximately two weeks time. ~ Janean

July 2, 2012 Image

NOTE TO SELF: When the nine month old puppy is out of sight and quiet for too long DO NOT assume he is napping. Because when you ask your children, “Where’s Blue?” he may come trotting from around the corner, carrying a piece of couch upholstery in his mouth, grinning his wolf-like grin. So, I doused the couch in green apple spray and pushed it up against the bay window, shutting down his favorite hangout/barking spot in the center of the window. This is when I’m thankful the couch is from 1999. I think my usually sweet and charming pup has officially entered The Teenage Years. Lord help me!!!! Now he’s sprawled out ready for a morning nap. Grrrrrr That’s me growlin’, not the dog…maybe I need a morning nap too. ~ Janean

June 27, 2012 Image

Outside again. Fourth time since 4:30am. Love the sunshine on my face and birdsong. Crazy woofing dog didn’t need to go, he found a stick and plopped in the shade to chew. “Stress?! What stress?!”, says Blue as he grins at me with his tongue lollying out one side of his mouth, looking crooked and quite hilarious. Sometimes I give in, and lie in the shade next to him in the grass and look up at the sky through a canopy of leaves. A Dog’s Eye View. He’s a smart pup, my Blue.

June 12, 2012 Image

I awoke to a “WOOF” at 4:20 a.m.
just as well since I was dreaming of pot roast
that’s a new one
diet induced dreaming
out we went
the sweet pup and I
in again for his breakfast
and mine
pot roast dreams long gone
filled instead with healthy cereal
sorta sated anyway
another “WOOF”
well, bowls are portable
out we go once more
this is my first birdsong breakfast
eaten in the open air
perched on the edge of the deck
by the stairs
the sky is moonlight blue
with a not quite half
not quite crescent moon
still hanging in the sky
the horizon begins to glow
in warm shades of gold
as the dog and I go in
once more
it’s time for coffee

June 12, 2012
it’s now 5:00 a.m.

June 6, 2012 Image

up since 5:00
one cup o’coffee down
a bowl of cereal too
almost 6:30 now
as I laugh and throw the ball for Blue
his appointment is at 8:30
that wonderful husband of mine
for 15 years and counting
20 years together in July
friends before that
today we find out
if the chemo has worked
or if the cancer has spread
yet here I am
playing with the dog
his dog
the one he’s always wanted
trying to keep the worries and fear at bay
until we know what the doctor has to say
other than THAT
it’s a beautiful morning
crisp early a.m. air
birdsong from the treetops
not much traffic noise
less than two hours to go
and then we’ll know
what’s next

June 6, 2012

May 28, 2012 Image

there is a crow
I just now spied
heckling the dog and I
with cawing
that never ends
I much prefer
early morning silence
other than the jingling
from my pup’s collar
caw caw caw
on a repetitive loop
I didn’t
get out of bed
for this
woof
awoke me
from a bizarre dream
in full color
a jumble of images
and me
in a place
I didn’t want to be
awake is better
even if it’s early
even if the crow
needs to stop
and fly away now
my eyes gritty
from tears cried
yesterday
ahhhhhhh
some actual birdsong
bye bye Mr. Crow
I didn’t even
resort to violence
though I considered
my options
he must have realized
not to mess with me
as I have no patience
for cawing
that never ends

May 28, 2012
written somewhere in the 5 o’clock a.m. hour
damn crow

May 16, 2012 Image

last night was for fireflies
the first ones of the year
this mornin’ is for pink clouds
and a crescent moon
still hangin’ in the sky
fireflies remind me
of my childhood summers
pink clouds are for my grandma
she painted some on canvas
and the teacher said,
“There is no such thing.”
Grandma wouldn’t budge
knew she was right
as she’d seen pink clouds
from atop the bluff
time and time again
so while I’m not a pink girl
I love pink cloud mornings
and greet them with a grin
as memories of my grandma
fill me up within

May 9, 2012 Image

This morning I drank my first mug o’coffee in the backyard with my sweet pup, Blue. Just a few more weeks of school day morning rush before summer vacation begins. Once it does, I can lollygag in the morning to my heart’s content. Not today though. Children to wake. Breakfast to eat. Lunches to make. Notebooks to sign. A drive to make. I’m almost ready for that second mug o’coffee. Though it might have to be To Go. ~ Janean