Mother’s Day

The birds serenaded Blue and I on our early morning walk. Thankfully the pouring rain from earlier had stopped, though we’d have walked anyway. Enjoying breakfast now and some quiet time before the boys wake up. I love being their mom. My oldest son gave me my Mother’s Day gift early by going to the Good Friday artist reception and service in April. My younger son wrote me a poem that I’m not supposed to know about, but I saw the rough draft on accident while looking for his weekly report. Since he was out sick three days last week his awesome teacher sent it home with Friday’s homework with a post-it, “For Andrew’s Eyes Only :-)” I didn’t peek! Hope everyone I know has a blessed day filled with abundant love that overflows. Hug each other close. I had no idea how much my parents loved me until I became a mom. I get it now. Love that knows no bounds.

May 10, 2015

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window view

playing in the snow
children laughing
snowballs flying
smiles shining too
looks normal
from the outside
only the inside knows
the truth
for reality
is anything but normal
life is never boring
if it is
it’s your own damn fault
we have your drama
real life kind
eyebrow raising
jaw dropping
gray hair causing too
but from the outside
if you are looking
from your window view
the drama doesn’t show
it’s skillfully hidden
behind brave faces
and eyes filled with secrets
heart kind
that never tell

February 23, 2013

drip drop drip

my poet’s heart
is quiet
though my eyes
are leakin’ tears
they fall silently
I can’t always
suck ‘em back
Lord knows
I try
‘cause I really
hate to cry
my poet’s heart
is squeezing
beating
pumping life
yet quiet
drip drop drip
damn it
no time for tears
the sun is shining
a new day begins
gotta go embrace it
my tears will dry
either evaporate
or in the wind

February 23, 2013

Here Lies the Remains of a Girl Who–Did What Now?: Put yourself back together.

autumndragonfly:

  • Sit quietly in a storm without an umbrella, without a word of complaint. Let the rain wash away every ounce of bitterness that has been used to write a eulogy on your skin.
  • You’re not dead.
  • Remember.
  • Drive down to the river. Drive down to where the industrial waste has not re-colored the…

I love the rain
Spring rains will come soon
Thunderstorms and gentle mists
I welcome both

I love walking in the woods
and on a gravel road
lined with trees on either side

I love resting
whether on a proper bench
or plopping on the ground

I love the river
especially Grandpa’s river
the mighty Mississippi
standing atop his bluff
looking o’er her curving path
there I can breathe

I love to smile
and often do
a gentle curve of lips
or crooked at the corner
a flash of teeth and quick laugh
full wattage mega kind too
the best ones reach my eyes

I love the rain
I walk my dog without an umbrella
wearing rain boots with peacocks
splashing through puddles
with a grin
laughing at my prancing pup

I am not dead. I am here. Thank you, God, for these simple things and the ability to find joy in quiet moments such as these. Thank you for family and friends, and the powerful prayers of Your people who are lifting up my cancer fighting husband and me and our boys asking for the strength and courage we need to weather this vicious storm. We are thankful, humbled and oh, so very blessed. Hope bubbles fresh anew each day. Your love will see us through. ~Janean

January 25, 2013

Here Lies the Remains of a Girl Who–Did What Now?: Put yourself back together.

smiling aunt heaven

My four year old nephew, said to me this morning, “Can you please get my boogers?”
Of course, I was glad to help him and even admit to finding his unusual request, quite charming.
I replied with a smile, “Let’s go find a tissue.”
Once said tissue was held up to his stuffy nose, I added, “Blow.”
*happy smiling good sunrise got some damn sleep my sister is here visiting from Arizona and I’m wearing purple for joy morning here…even with huge dark circles, no makeup and eyes that kinda hurt from yesterday’s tears*
~ Aunt Janean

January 12, 2013

letter of reflection

Dear Sad Girl,
Your eyes have lost their sparkle.
Must be those dark circles, detracting and subtracting the twinkle from your eyes, the windows to your creative soul.
Your face is set and sullen.
That grin that once was impish, now set in a line or hangin’ inside down.
Holy hell what a mess.
I know it’s hard now, in this moment, but we’ll get you through this.
Someday soon Faith, Hope and Love will heal the wounds within.
Keep on going.
Day by day abiding.
The loving arms of friends and family will catch you when you fall.
So try to find your smile.
Savor Joy in the quiet colors of the dawn.
Pep talks are FREE and plentiful.
Hugs are often the best medicine.
Love is the easy part.
Start by being gentle with yourself.
Love,
Me

November 17, 2012